The Black Bird
Why is everyone after George Segal's bird? Because he's Sam Spade Jr... and his falcons worth a fortune.
After the death of private detective Sam Spade, his son, Sam Spade Jr. (who only knew his father very briefly) is forced to inherit his San Francisco detective agency, much to his chagrin. He also must keep his father's sarcastic secretary, Effie Perrine ('Godzilla'), and must continue his father's tradition of 'serving minorities'. One day, an obese man named Caspar Gutman is killed just outside Spade's building, his last words being 'It's black and as long as your arm'. Later on, Spade is given an offer by a member of the Order of St. John's Hospital to purchase his father's useless copy of the Maltese Falcon. A right-wing thug named Gordon Immerman (Spade calls him 'Andrew Jackson' after he gave Spade his 'calling card', a bill), has been hired to make sure Spade delivers the bird, but he quickly warms to the detective, although the feeling is not mutual. Later on, he gets an offer from a Wilmer Cook, but before they can negotiate, he is killed. Shortly thereafter, he encounters a beautiful and mysterious Russian woman named Anna Kemidov, daughter of the general who once owned the real Maltese Falcon. She wants it, as well, and is willing to seduce Spade to get it. It isn't long before Spade is dealing with Litvak, a bald, Nazi dwarf surrounded an army of Hawaiian thugs. In the ensuing chaos, Immerman tries to become Spade's partner, Spade discovers that his 'false' copy may be the real thing, and Anna continues to make love to him- or is she?
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